Artist: Idina Menzel
Song: Let It Go
Legend has it that there was a time when people could find love without technology. Some people would be set up on blind dates by friends that happened to be perfect matches. Others would meet people on campus without having any prior knowledge about them. People would even magically meet each other and known within 30 minutes that they had found their future spouse. Well, that’s how my parents met.
With the introduction of the smartphone and social media, people have become more connected, but less intentional in their attempts to meet people. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, SnapChat, Tindr, Grindr, et al. have ruined any possibility of meeting someone the “old-fashioned way.” However, from an outsiders perspective, it seems that straight people have a better chance of meeting the people without the internet.
As a gay man on a southern college campus, it is not easy to find other gay men. While there have been times I’ve had classes with other gay guys, they’ve never been my “type.”
However, through Facebook/Instagram/SnapChat/Twitter it is possible to connect with other people like me. But even when you know who someone is, how do you know if they’re interested to you?
SO, here’s my guide to social media interactions in the gay community.
***Obviously I did extensive primary research to get this information***
1.) Facebook –
Finding someone on Facebook is fairly rare. In fact, Facebook has become more important as a resource to back check a guy: to see what he’s like, if he has good pictures, that kind of thing.
- However, if a guy ever adds you, there is a good chance that he’s into you. Especially if you’ve never met, or only met a few times.
- If he likes a profile picture that you just put up, he may have a crush. BUT, if he likes an old profile picture that means he was stalking you, and that means he digs you.
- If he likes random pictures of you, he likes you.
- If he ever messages you or vice versa you might as well date, let’s be honest.
2.) Twitter –
- If a cute guy follows you on Twitter, don’t ask questions and let it happen. If he seems funny/interesting/thoughtful follow back.
- If he ever favorites your tweets he wants to remind you he exists, but if he ever retweets a tweet he is showing that he’s interested in you as well.
- Replying to tweets of his can come off as weird/desperate. WE’VE ALL BEEN THERE THOUGH. IT’S OK.
3.) Instagram –
Instagram is the great connector of the gay community, in my opinion. You can see how a boy sees the world, and, more importantly, himself.
**WARNING: If he only posts pictures of himself, he is insecure/looking for attention/obsessed with himself **
However, this doesn’t mean you necessarily should run away: don’t pass complete judgement without knowing him.
- If a guy you don’t know ever follows you on Instagram you must immediately check his profile to see mutual interests and friends. If you are interested follow your little heart out.
- After following each other there is a strange period of time where you both see who will be the first to like the other’s photos. If he likes yours first, you have the upper hand. But the opposite will be true if you like his pictures first.
- If he follows any of your close girlfriends and likes their pictures that you’re in, he definitely likes you and is trying to get your attention.
- If boy comments on your pictures he wants your attention.
- With Instagram direct being a thing now, if he were to ever send you a message he wants to marry you, apparently.
4.) Tumblr –
Tumblr is a blogging site that is somewhat melodramatic. It’s a very strange community of people, but they’re very accepting of others, which is great. I actually know a few guys who have met through Tumblr and stayed friends/a couple.
A lot people prefer to keep their Tumblr’s private because they are so open with their thoughts and feelings on them.
- If you have a Tumblr and a guy finds it, he did some intensive investigations. Take note of that and know that he could be going back in your history and learning all about you.
5.) SnapChat –
SnapChat is ridiculous, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore the implications of communicating with a guy through it.
- If you know the guy in real life, and he adds you, it may be harmless. What matters is whether you send snaps to each other.
- If you send occasional SnapChats to him, and he doesn’t answer, he is either trying to play it cool, or he may just not be into you.
- If he sends you pictures, it’s more likely that he is interested. However, if he initiates conversation over SnapChat he’s definitely into you.
- Same goes for if he responds to your story or a picture that was obviously sent to the masses.
There is an app for gay men called Grindr which allows you to find guys close by.
I REFUSE. I don’t want inappropriate pictures sent to me, thanks.
All of these tips should be take with a grain of salt. Obviously anytime another guy makes connection through social media it doesn’t mean he’s interested. . . but sometimes.
And all jokes aside, while it is harder to find other gay guys close by, it doesn’t mean you should give up hope.
A relationship would probably move along more authentically if you meet in real life, which I know because I’m a relationship expert.
But if you do have a crush on someone through social media, make the first step to bring the relationship to the real world!
You never know what can happen.
For comments & inquiries, please e-mail me at email@example.com